Life is Beautiful

Amidst the confusion that life had shored her way, and feeling that she had to start all over again, Eve replayed “Your heart is smiling, you are warm on the inside, there is a new longing and yearning, feels right, you found it! Pursue happiness. To deny the innate desire to want and be wanted is to deny existence”.

Yes, I know this introduction is very confusing; it is part of a Skype chat with a certain Eve. Don’t you just appreciate technology?

She is venting and strategizing because the guy she had started having kids with (in her head that is) has unceremoniously, surprisingly, insensitively pulled the plug. She did not think that this particular Adam was wired that way. But remember that ‘Everything is prewired phylogenenically’; meaning that – and this is profound – species of the same group have the same predetermined coding and therefore evolve the same way. It is the same pedigree:)

A long time friendship between this Eve and the Adam in question had turned steamy. They had reconnected after almost half a decade of non-communication punctuated by occasional phone calls. Their friendship dates back to high school but now, the scenario is different – both are leading fulfilling lives, setting the stage for a pull in the ‘settling’ direction. [The number of relationships that start first by mentioning ‘settling’ never really settle, just an observation :)]

Amid flirtatious chats, Adam tells Eve that he had always fancied her; she believes him because they had a ‘semi-platonic’ relationship and none of them thought it would lead to a deep relationship hence there was never any pressure to impress the other. Now continents away, texting and occasional trans-Atlantic phone calls is their mode of communication. They seem to be reading from the same book and both tend to bank everything on the fact that they are/were friends who genuinely like(d)each other. He seemed very keen on her and on many occasions, called her ‘a gem worth having’.

Whether jokingly or not, Adam had talked some very deep stuff (as deep as kids, how deeper can it get?). Then something happened and the guy went quiet, he was no longer the hunter. He stopped texting and when he did, the texts bordered on civil, (I do not want to call them meaningless); the kind of text he would send to just about anybody. Something like ‘Hey, how are you?; I am well and work was slow today; Good night’ – the type that leaves you thinking ‘and this is related to what exactly’?

On her part, she was not texting him a lot either, and the reason for lull in communication on her end was that she realized they were making plans and promises yet they hadn’t seen each other for ages. She wanted to meet him first before laying serious ‘ground work’. But she realized that actually, both sides had cooled off so she inquired from him via text – ‘Why are you so quiet on me lately’? And boom came the bomb!

The same guy who had talked about them settling down together gave an answer which would throw even the new breed of Eve into disarray.

Adam: ‘I am just getting confused by a pal of mine here, as we get to know each other slowly’

Eve: “OK, good to know and I wish you well on that front”

Evidently, Adam had abandoned ‘their book’ quarter way and bolted.Someone else had, in the twinkle of an eye, caught his fancy. (You are strongly advised to smile because you cannot frown – we don’t have enough Botox in the world these days:)) and the fact that he was open about it was no mean feat.

Eve is taken aback and the temptation was to ask him why he had changed his mind about them, but she felt she did not have the energy to dig into ‘the why’. People have rights.

Adam: ‘are you mad at me? Are you dismissing me?”

Even this Adam must have wondered which breed of Eve this was. Didn’t she want to seek for answers?

On this Skype chat, Eve was wondering how she should handle the whole ‘situation’ in order to avert an imminent emotional blow-up. On second thought she decided to hold up her own. Rules of engagement allow her to be upset BUT not wiping dignity from the face of the earth. And well, Adam had spoken, so it was time for Eve to respond.

Eve: “I am not mad at you. You found it, makes you warm on the inside, makes your heart smile, ignites a new longing and yearning, challenges your intellect, feels right, found it! Pursue happiness. To deny the innate desire to want and be wanted is to deny existence”

Eve does not know if his new catch is ‘all that’, and her response is vague enough to almost mean nothing. However she felt that she needed to send a message that she would not in anyway be reminding him that they ‘complete each other’s sentences’ and therefore should be together. To lighten the chat, I told her in conclusion that “one good male for every good female” is a mirage; if that were the case, we would all rattle our way to our ‘ribs’ (in this case, our mates) like Ezekiel with the valley of dry bones (for those who have a Biblical inclination).

But i could not help but conclude that to think that one would control the way someone else thinks, acts and believes is to live in utopia.All the same, Life is beautiful; chances (for new jobs, new relationships, new alliances, etc) are NOT in short supply.

By Fridah

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29 thoughts on “Life is Beautiful

  1. How did you know I was frowning? lo. Lovely piece and that last bit is so true.

    • @ Maria hehehe welcome to use quotes and glad you like the blog. Nice to have you here.

  2. I like this blog, you actually sound like you mean for us to understand what you talking about, many blogs make me go like, “huh?”

    • Hey @ Auspleng,glad you like and nice to have you here. Tell your friends about it!

  3. what i believe, and you seem to based on some of your assertions, is that every new day is a chance to start a fresh or as kidum says” Tunayo nafasi ya kuanza tena..

  4. For a moment there, I thought you were taking about me.
    She spoke Nyeri Kikuyu yet we lived in Kirinyaga Kikuyu land. That is what drew her to me in the first place. And the fact she is very beautiful. However, our relationship, nay my relationship with her was purely platonic. She was also my confidant.
    Having been brought up middle income and she coming from peasantry coffee and tea land, our tastes in things life were quite different, are quite different. And the fact that she is born again and I am a free wheeler.
    However, this blog topic has opened my eyes. She left Kirinyaga Kikuyuland and now leaves in Kiambu Kikuyuland. We speak over the phone sometimes. Some mundane stuff once a while.
    I will call her over for the weekend and tell her everything. It was purely platonic and she can move on. I have; into the world of senior bachelorhood with a step daughter on the side to look after.

    • Oh and there was no mathogothanio. Honest. Never thought about it. Scouts honour.

    • It’s thoughtful, nay conscientious, of you to think of calling her…..let’s hope that her life is beautiful 🙂

  5. Radio! Hey…….i was thinking about you leo. Guess what? i am reading the book now ( i do not need to tell you which one ) and the starting made me think ” what did i give that kid?” hahhahahaha ok i will post soon ‘on the thread’ with my review and will wait to read your review too

    Welcome to 44 to stay!
    Thanks

  6. After a very boring lesson and loads of work, this post has just lifted my spirits! Kwanza the “do not frown just smile…we do nat have enough Botox part”…:D
    Very nice!!:)

  7. This is interesting…..classic case of an Adam ‘moving forward’ maybe the issue was Lungula……? i think it was LUNGULA.As in he could not wait? It seems as though he actually liked that Eve but the oceans between them were doing nothing to help…all the same,life is beautiful.

  8. it takes very committed people to keep a long-distance relationship going …..

    • Mpenzi, you are right there……..sometimes it seems like hope is in the ICU but there are those moments where you see life is beautiful.

  9. Nice way to break up with a dude……love your blog.I have spread the good news and my friends like it.

  10. A very powerful piece which I am glad to have come across. It moves with a momentum of its own but it was when I read the following lines that I came closer to understanding what serious doubts Eve must feel.

    “…Someone else had, in the twinkle of an eye, caught his fancy.
    To deny the innate desire to want and be wanted is to deny existence”
    Eve does not know if his new catch is all that
    One good male for every good female is a mirage….”

    Could this also be about the “love that dare not speak its name”?

    • @ Woolie,just like this Eve,we have all been there,when thought that a relationship or a job etc was moving in the ‘right’ direction only to be caught off guard……..such is life…..but Life is still beautiful:)

  11. Sigh!! Sometimes life…….er…..Adams are too complicated to comprehend:( Anyhow,love your writing!

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