The recipe for successful marriages is simple really if you thought about it. If you are someone inclined to consult your Bible for the regular piece of advice then you do realize that happy marriages are hinged on a command; two commands actually. ‘Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord…Husbands love your wives, even as Christ loved the church…’ goes the twin commands.
Understanding why an Eve has to be commanded to submit to Adam and why an Adam has to be commanded to love Eve will quite evidently unlock the tangle of unworkable unions between Adams and Eves. Getting this, I repeat is the key to working out formula for marital bliss. All else would be unworkable props and disappointing contrivances that never will settle the marriage conundrum.
As an Adam, I pretty know much how loving Eve day in, day out (and maybe you could add night in, night out) is quite the fender-bender. It is no-brainer that Eves love strongly and when they love they love unto death. And so for them the issue of loving Adam is not much of a concern. The issue for Eve would be the attaining a measure of self-willed submission to the Adam in her life. Not many an Eve can hack it. And therein the battle of sexes is wrought for no Adam will love an Eve who won’t submit and no Eve will submit to an Adam who can’t love.
This is a treatise that attempts to address the thorny issues of women’s role in the current zeitgeist of radical feminism that is pushing for a ruinous chimera called equality of the sexes.
The lie has been peddled long enough that Eves are inferior to Adams but evident truths available discount this fallacy: womenfolk have scaled the heights of academia and career, politics and leadership – all with a panache that would smash to smithereens the stolid insinuations about their supposed inferiority. But that’s just about where the fun ends because diverse events indicate that Eves would rather stretch their progress to the hilt in an attempt to negate the role of Adams. Babes, you all have come along way, but there are just some shores you can’t step onto. Shores, like the kind we’ll be discussing in a jiffy.
Genesis Chapter 3 is probably the saddest chapter in the whole Bible. After the first couple on earth got an upbraiding for their misdeed, it was time for some consequences to be spelt out.
Painful labour was appointed for Eve, but on top of that something was added which essentially became the genetic make-up of many woman alive – an untamable spirit. Simply put: God cursed womenfolk to ever desire to exercise domination of men. It began from the moment Eve chose not to follow Adam’s instructions on the tree in the middle of the garden and allowing the ‘substil’ serpent make her believe that consultation with Adam wasn’t such a great deal. Next was her ability to inveigle Adam into partaking of the fruits. The putative ‘strength of a woman’ began right in the Garden of Eden.
And he shall rule over thee became Adam’s imprimatur (license) to ‘sit’ on Eve. And that is how negative patriarchy gained a foothold in the psyche of mankind ever since. You see, as God read out the sentence to the two ingrates, Adam was all ears and it became painfully clear that the fact that for allowing the woman to be the source of his fall the slate wasn’t cleared with the expulsion from Eden. Eve would be a thorn in the flesh for many, many, many years to come. The forbidden fruit was just the harbinger of feminine intransigence.
History is replete with the vicious and horrendous subjugation that women were subjected to. Women simply had no rights in most of the primitive cultures that cropped up after the fall of man and subsequent expulsion from the Edenian idyll. No culture can be said to have honoured the role of the woman. Save, for the occasional appearance of some Woman of Substance in the annals of history who either by sheer courage or matrimony managed to change the course of history, the role of women in the vast ages of recorded history is one of heart-rending suffering. The overweening influence of patriarchy and the priapic exuberance in the exaggerated role of the male all played a hand in the denigration women. All cultures without exception are guilty of this sin. The original Adam must have really rammed the message home. The women’s lot was headed for its scary run unhindered until the message of Christianity captured the hearts of men.
Of a truth, Christianity has worked the main part in liberating women from the shackles of inanely inspired quest for male-dominance and as well as the silly prerogatives of patriarchy which were mainly inspired by fear rather than by the need for healthy congress of the sexes. As the gospel traveled the world, women began to enjoy the freedom which men, freed from the yoke of sin and the sense of entitlements that made them think that women were but fair game to male superiority, extended to them.
With time the liberties granted to women enabled them to make much so headway in the important sectors of the society which enabled them to bargain for more and more concessions from men. These concessions however led to other stuff more diabolical than the subjugation of women- the emasculation of man.
All over the world today women are taking over the reigns of all spheres of leadership and governance. This takeover is accompanied with much belligerence and the noisome natters that insinuate that men have largely been ineffectual in carrying out their mandates. In politics, churches, industries and boardrooms (and sadly even in bedrooms) women are being touted as better leaders.
The solution lies with the twin commands I pointed up there. However, the woman who wants a successful marriage will l require a marked understanding of the biblical role of an Eve and an Adam as is explained very well in 1 Peter 3:1-7 and everywhere else in the Bible with the emphasis on man’s headship.
Those who reject wisdom are bound to suffer for it. The wisdom of the world pushes for gung-ho woman in all spheres. Wisdom from above calls for Eves who are willing and are ready to submit the Adams in their lives. It is designed to work that way and anything else will not probably work. So, what will the Adams and Eves reading this have? Love and submission or arguments and counter arguments?
Going back to the basics is that simple.
Have your say.
By Dinky Boy – Guest Writer