Laws of Attraction

I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me. I love you for the part of me that you bring out.Roy Croft.

Ever found yourself pondering over something for days and days?  OK, that sounds like a lame start to a post hehehehe. Here is the thing, I have met many new people in the past weeks, mostly at parties where introductions go something like this, “Hi Fridah, meet my boyfriend” or “I think my boyfriend lost his direction to the party” but a few minutes later, the boyfriend arrives, and she says, “Fridah, this is my boyfriend, he lives just a few blocks away”. I would not exactly call it being accosted by these introductions but yes, I have been meeting Eves’ boyfriends, husbands and fiancés and ‘friends with benefits’ too :). In all these, one question has lingered in my mind: what gets people attracted to each other?’ It is not exactly a novel thought but the reason why it has crossed my mind is that some of these couples seemed mismatched.

We all have our thing(s) when it comes to what we think is attractive in a potential Eve or Adam. Some people have a thing for physique. Now, do not be fooled when you hear Eve saying that is does not matter, it does – this ranks way up there for many Eves; in fact, some will even dissect it further and say Adam “must have a cute ass”. You may hear that phrase and start getting confused but the reality is that some Eves have their eyes on Adam’s posterior. I confess that I have a thing for fingers – OK, I know that sounds odd, OK gross 😉 but it is a physical attribute that intrigues me. However, sometimes it is hard to put your finger on it, like what exactly gets one attracted – all I can tell you is that  some of these attractions can feel like electric voltage going through your mortal body, especially when you seem to check all the boxes as far as the exterior goes. Come on now! I said it before, everyone deserves the right to a jolt of this electric voltage – in fact, I think it should be declared an inherent fundamental right, that since all human beings are born equal, everyone must experience this feeling at least once in a lifetime.

So Eve will wish that he is tall, dark, with smashing looks, a six pack and money in his wallet (why don’t you just say Tsonga – and no, I am not self combusting as I write this ;)). I believe all that stuff about the ego and how it does not allow us to have meaningful interaction when we meet someone for the first time, because we give them an outward ‘once over’ and write them off immediately – our minds tell us ‘no  chance!’ (well, unless he comes back in a Bugatti). The fact is that Eves do that a lot of the time:  they look at a guy and say to themselves “do not even think about it mate”. And then of course, there is that part of Eve that wants her friends to see her with a ‘yummy’ guy, even if the other facets of the package are far from perfect. Ego has a lot to do with it. Maybe I should stop pondering because I know the answer….

So in all these introductions, I met this couple. I will single them out because they seem like a most unlikely couple .She is pretty, very pretty, with a lot of energy and excellent people skills. When we met, we hit if off immediately, she told me about the country at length and I thought that she is really cool. Amid the conversation, she told me, “I live together with these guys and my boyfriend” and she pointed at him. Normally, you are supposed to offer compliments or something (right?) J. I said “nice” as in nice that they have their little ‘community’. He is not ugly or anything, it is just that if I had been told to guess, I would probably have paired her with the best looking dude in the house that night. I met the pair of them again on another night and I thought to myself – well, they seem happy, maybe this is the missing code: hook up with an unlikely guy and it will work!

Around this time, Joyce turned up with ‘The Weather Men’ post and how these ‘metereological men’ have this unenviable ability to unleash ‘fog’ in unbelievable proportions. I was reminded of this friend (I swear it is not me!) who was dating this handsome Adam; this man looked edible, and by edible I mean in all ways that led another friend to say that this Adam was so good looking, “anakaa kama anaweza wekwa kwa sahani akuliwe na ugali”. This loosely translates from Swahili to mean “he looks likes he can be laid on a platter and be eaten” and when that is said in Kiswahili, I laugh until the morning comes. Now this does not apply to all good looking men but we know that there are some problems that bedevil dating ‘an edible man’, other than the attention from all quarters and always being on one’s toes just in case he gets snatched away in broad daylight. Some of these edible men have an ability to command “fog”. This friend of mine experienced it – for all the man’s looks, he proceeded to unlease so much fog on her and I thought dismally, well, this is what one gets for hooking up with “edible umande commanders” (fog). I am not saying she was going for his looks – there must have been something more to him that she liked, and for sure it was not his fog unleashing capabilities.

If you ask Eves for their opinion on this, you will hear interesting views. One Eve told me that it is not necessary that a man is smashing hot, he must only be bearable to look at. Of course this was said in jest, but you will not blame me for raising my plucked eyesbrows and thinking about him – yeah, you know who …………Tsonga! ( I am self combusting now hahahahha) and Hill Harper and Michael Ealy (in that order) and then moving from my eye candy (it is futile imagination, I know) to embracing the “bearable”, also known as “Mr. Regulars”. OK, I am kidding! I have dated the “unlikely” guy and well, I do not have a story with a happy ending to tell. But these seemingly ‘mismatched’ couples got me thinking and you can tell that they have inspired this post. They spurred something in me and reminded me of what the essence of a relationship is: being happy together, sharing life, living life and just being there for each other. And this may not necessarily have anything to do with how a guy looks.

So, on a serious note, to you all Eves out there, think of how many Adams you have written off – just based on how they do not meet your stringent physique criteria and then turned around and declared “there are no men to date”. I mean, he does not have to be as tall as you thought, or as eloquent, with a great sense of humor, a Barry White voice and long fingers that set your imagination on a sprint. Men have all these other qualities that can only be unearthed only by interacting and that means you have to look beyond the stringent criteria. Of course, you will still have aspects that you would find attractive (remember that that inherent voltage right, ;))?

I hope that next time an opportunity presents, you will remember this post and be inspired to explore even when the initial seems improbable. Give it a try and see how or where it goes, right?

Have a good week!

By Fridah

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The Weather Men

Have you heard of the song “It’s Raining Men”? This is how the song starts:

Humidity is rising

Barometer’s getting low….

The song then goes on to promise that about half past ten, it’s going to rain men…..and wishes for God to bless Mother Nature because she is a single woman too!

God bless Mother Nature indeed. I can’t say that it is raining men but indeed, there are MEN in this world and then there are men. And then there are the weather men. We are not talking about the weather men you see on your screen, conjecturing on what the weather is going to be like whilst swiping their hands over the general area of the Horn of Africa. We are talking about men who deliver real elements of weather right on your doorstep, sometimes through the front door and into your bedroom.

If you’ve had quite a significant dating life span (which means that you did not settle down at the age of 25 and went forth to bear children and raise a family), then you will certainly have had your fair share of weather men if you are an Eve or weather woman if you are an Adam. I certainly have had mine. Now, this is not to blame exes for the failure of relationships past but only to give examples of how men can (humongously ;)) contribute to the demise of relationships.

Sometimes we don’t get a warning sign

I am talking about men who will date a woman for a substantial period of time; they will invest time, money and affection in a relationship with this Eve and even talk about plans for the future. They will lead or leave Eve to believe that they have something good going, that they are in an exclusive relationship and short of proposing marriage, that they are going to settle down and raise a family, keep a cat or a dog and possibly a few farm animals in the yonder years. Then one sneaky day, they wake up and decided that the weather has been far too clear as far as this relationship is concerned and they proceed to unleash copious amounts of fog that eventually lead to the demise of that relationship. From that, I think you may decipher the Project 44 terminology: fog here refers to all those signals (or lack of them) that send unclear messages and bring doubts about a relationship, all coming from the blue – and from the blue here can also imply from a blue sky – which can be very confusing times indeed! Eve discovers that Adam actually has a whole other life planned with someone else or no one in particular and that after all, she has been in a relationship with a plan instead of a man. ‘It’s not her, it’s him’ – that kind of crap. You can imagine when you are driving through Kinungi or any other location where fog abounds: as a motorist, you can barely see ahead and it completely disorients you; you fear for your life because you don’t know what lies ahead and whether some mad motorist is going to be reckless and cause you harm. That is how it feels when you date a weather man who, after seemingly being in a relationship with, unleashes ‘FOG’ on your life and you are just left disoriented.

Long distance relationships are no walk on the beach; they require commitment and then some. Now, imagine dating a man who whilst you are miles apart from each other is very dedicated to the relationship, makes time to chat, does voice and video calls, emails you to tell you how he woke up thinking of you and sends you e-cards to tell you how much he misses. Then lo and behold, the day you happen to be in the same country or town or village, he proceeds to unleash what we call ‘mawingu na umande’ in Swahili (clouds and fog). Untold amounts of heavy clouds that threaten to rain on your parade because as soon as you are in the same ‘vicinity’ with this Adam, he becomes scarce. These fellows can be referred to as ‘the lords of umande’. Thick clouds form along the lines of communication and meeting up with him becomes like an attempt to move out of the green zone in Baghdad. You ask yourself why this man was so available when you were miles apart, but now that you are in the same latitude and longitude, it is such an effort to get to spend time with him. You wonder how he could have been so affectionate from afar and yet so unavailable when you are a stone throw away. You recognize that this weather man is bringing heavy condensation into your life, you smell a rat and the rest is history….

I am talking of men who are versed in leaving Eve feeling like she has just sped through a turnstile. Think of a man whom you are building a relationship with, getting to know each other and actually, getting to like each other a lot and just when you think that the prince you are about to kiss (assuming you haven’t taken a plunge and gone all the way) isn’t a frog, Adam just minuses himself from your life and disappears into thin air…..well, at least for a while. Try as you may, you cannot reach him and when you think back, you realize that you don’t have contacts of his family or friends; after all, you were only getting to know each other…..you imagine that something tragic has happened to him, you worry yourself sick wondering if he is lying in some hospital somewhere sick or even worse but you just don’t know what to do. Then a few days pass, you try to reach him again and this time you get through to him! Then as you talk to him you realize that something did happen to him – he just walked out of your life. Now those are the ones I call LOAFs – the lords of all things fog. They command ‘umande’ in all its entirety and proceed to unleash it on you.

Now, if you have experienced any of these or similar weather elements, especially in succession, then you are bound to feel like you have been run over by a steam roller and that unless the Messiah came down on a ladder, there is no hope in relationships. And who would blame you? After all, weather men tell you that the day will have a clear blue sky with a smile of sunshine and you dress for the weather, only for it to pour down later in the afternoon.

The beauty of life is that there are good men out there, not weather men, datable men whose meteorological expertise and aspirations are negligible, men who add to the value of love and life. Ask me, I know. But that’s another post altogether.

By Joyce

Random Musings

I left the village and all ‘accostation’ thereof. We took a one month break because Joyce was very busy, hehehe, OK – kidding! Let’s say we took a month off, slaved slightly at Alex’s blog and now we have been back for 2 weeks and I still feel like my brain has been formatted. As such, I am not sure what to blog about today but hope you can survive through my musings. Random, very random stuff.

On this day, I am on my way to Nairobi in a matatu and there was a guy sitting next to me who I could tell was not from my ushago (village) at all. He was ‘big-boned’, like he had swallowed something, but kind of good looking. After spending time looking for an ice breaker (you know you can tell when some wants to make conversation), he finally says, “these seats are so hard”. Hehehe – yes, I hear that and wonder whether seats in matatus come with style and comfort. Brilliant ice breaker I tell you! He then looks at the newspaper I am reading and says “this guy is messed up” – he was referring to the story of a member of the Kenyan Parliament who was embroiled in a saga involving the death of a certain university student. He picks up the thread of partying in that saga and goes on to tell me about clubbing joints in Westlands. These are wrong stories for me because I don’t give a hoot about clubbing. As I listen to him, I start to get exhausted (as exhausted as I get watching the current maneuvers in the Kenyan political arena). So I try to go back to my paper but he would not let me! You know those people who just talk regardless of whether you are listening or not? Fortunately, the journey comes to an end, and then he decides that since he has talked to me for an hour (on and off), about stories that I was least interested in, he now has the rights to have my cell phone number :). Of course I did not give him my number because he did not give me reason to. This got me thinking (and I am not saying he was flirting or anything) but if Adam wants to talk to Eve, the golden rule is to just break the ice immediately and watch for non-verbal communication. If she does not listen to you (if you are keen you will know), do not force and do not ask for her number because she will not give you.

On this other day, I am in totally different continent – nothing like what I am used to. No cows, no chicken and certainly no goats (I miss my goats ;)). After what seems like a travel adventure I was not keen on, I finally arrive at my hotel. It was Sunday so the reception was closed – and everything was in French. It took the help of two men from Togo to help me decipher the codes and get the key to my room. They were my angels that day! These guys were actually very gracious; they helped me with my suitcases (my employer does not believe in sending taxis – call it being frugal) and this got me thinking that people should make effort to learn a foreign language-at least the basics. If you have an opportunity to learn a foreign language, by all means, please do. If you feel that your brain has frozen and hence can’t, then encourage those around you to do so – send your kids, nephews and nieces, etc to foreign language classes. By the way, all this stuff that parents are making kids do, cramming stuff in the name of attaining straight A’s so that they can go to national schools and that you-are-nothing-without-these-grades doctrine really gets my goat. How about kids get the opportunity to learn and explore new things, new hobbies and yes, new languages?

Whilst I was still in this city, I got news that ‘cuddle lover’ (my goat back in the village) was on heat. For all the months I was home, this goat did not show any heat signs – I would have looked for a billy goat ASAP! This news brought so much joy to my heart ….like….like  I don’t know…like I had delivered a small ka-Fridah. Hehhehehe. So I was frantic, trying to tell my younger brother to find a billy goat .Now, I have to say that I am no fun of pets (yeah these goats are pets to me, seeing that our cats won’t come even 30 centimeters near human beings and my mum would not let me have a dog that lounges on the couch) but somehow, I got these goats and bonded with them. Now I know why they tell you to get a pet if you want to know if you can take care of another person (read Eve or Adam). See, I would be in the living room, watching my favorite local soap (‘Lies That Bind’) and they would be out there making noise because it was too late and they were still tethered :(. I would have to run out, get them into the shed and by the time I got back, the well-acted scene would be gone! What did I learn from all this? True, get a pet and see how they kind of soften you up and yes, you will know if there is room for another soul in your heart. I think to some extent, they are like kids, only without diapers (thank heaven!)

So still in this foreign city, I am at the head office and I have to visit a certain department because they needed to give me some gadget that I need for the field. During this visit, I meet this very good looking guy and his workmate (who is not so cute hehehhe) and we talk a bit. Adam has these nice ‘piercing’ eyes and attractive physique – I think this is what Joyce refers to as ‘gait’ (in general terms). He seems impressed by this lass (yes, me!), asks me what I will doing for the weekend and invites me for coffee. I could tell guy was my junior – age-wise – and I wonder if the cougar in me must have gone into a deep sleep. In the end, we did not meet up but I saw an opportunity. What did I learn from all this? Well, the old adage that “there are opportunities everywhere” only if you are willing and open to make it happen; note – willing is the key word here. Later on, I took a walk with one of the men from Togo as he showed me around the city and I thanked him for his kindness. He seemed keen on making some dinner plans, offered to make me a meal but I was not keen on it. This experience has compelled me to think that the myth that there are no men to hang out with should die. I mean, I was in a new city and I got people to talk to and hang out with if I wanted to. So next time you go to a new place, just enjoy and explore it! Who knows?!

Now, the downside to all this (and a real downer at that) was that I was hoping I would bump into that French tennis player who oozes youth (is the cougar awake? heheheh) and confidence, with just the right height, well-built body and a veracious forehand. Yes, this would be none other than the one and only Jo-Wilfried Tsonga. Tsonga, Oh Tsonga! Have you guys seen how he roars on the tennis court? Jo-Wilfried Tsonga, you handsome lad, the streets were bare without you!

Now, in a completely different location and end of the world, I am in a compound where 98% of the residents are Adams. Being away from home can be tough; but then being away from home and being somewhere ‘locked up’ with only men should fall under “unacceptable living conditions”. This is the feeling I got when I arrived in this particular compound. All these Adams walking around and then from nowhere two Eves arrive! I know what I saw – men addressed me looking at my ‘ASSets’ and not ‘me’ (hey, I am way up here!!). At dinner, one Adam came up to me and started being tactless, telling me how the compound is full of men and he can tell that I am from Kenya because of my “pretty structure” (‘ASSets’ have a way of causing ‘COMMOTION’ I tell you!) and then decides to cross the line – just plainly saying he wanted to get laid. I felt like I was in a den of tigers – talk of excessive ‘tigritude’ aimed at the wrong direction! There was way too much testosterone in that compound!I guess it is good for me to announce that I came out unscathed and I promise a ‘proper’ post next time ! 🙂

Have a good week!

By Fridah

Me and Mine

A while back, I posted a comment on Project 44. I did not expect to get a follow-up e-mail but I did! It read like this;  ‘…And now that you are praying for a wife, maybe you can be a guest writer on our blog and tell us what exactly Adams are looking for in Eves?..’ After a hearty laughter, I became worried! I had this morbid fear that she was (knowingly or unknowingly) partaking something stronger than the ARVs and formalin that ‘spice’ our little treats. Then I thought, what the heck! I might as well have a go at it. And in doing so, I’ll probably have a better look at myself, from a different angle, your angle. I’ll probably get some backlash, something to tantalize my mind, question me, and get those thinking juices flowing. And maybe, just maybe, this is the forum that will facilitate my chancing upon her, that is, assuming that, God indeed purposed me to marry

I have conditions; any self-respecting Adam would (or should). Something to hide behind….

  1. That I speak for no man. I was born alone, live in my skin and might probably have no death-mate.
  2. That I know very little, if anything. Let it be known, that I only came number 1 in class two. That I have never led anything, anything that meant something since then and that even on the said occasion, I was heavily ‘motivated’ by my mother’s slipper.
  3. That if indeed I had knowledge, at 34, I’d already be married and directing the (excess) energy generated in my nether region, into more worthy causes.
  4. That I have made many mistakes in my life, taken wrong turns and what’s even more likely, is that I’ll make many more. This write-up may actually be a ‘mistake’ in its own right.

Deal? Therefore, without further ado, after using so many words to say very little, let ‘us’ get into it.

Man is selfish. You might want it put in a more diplomatic manner, something softer. I say, a cow remains a cow, from whatever angle you look at it. I am selfish, you are selfish, we all are selfish! When we undertake selfless ventures, we do so with some little form of selfishness. Yes! It’s like when we use the phrase ‘giving back to the community’, ‘I have done something noble, something Godly’, it is also to feel good about ourselves. Someone once told me that giving is receiving and my mind interpreted it to mean, ‘anyone expecting something in return for giving, wants more than they have given!’ That cannot be fair! ‘Gerrit’?

Please, before you condemn me as a charlatan, hear me out. Why am I saying this? Being the selfish individual that I am, I want to live a decent life. A life with little pleasures, a long life, a pleasant life. It is in this regard that I’ve always (and might always) needed help. When I was a baby I needed my parents, now that I have pubic hair I need a wife (hopefully, one with pubic hair of her own) and when I grow senile I’ll need my children. All these to help serve a purpose in my (selfish) life. Agreed?

Now, here is the thing. I know that the people I have/will need, are selfish themselves. My parents are selfish, my wife will be selfish and my kids will be selfish too. My parents probably had me (I hope that I was a planned pregnancy) to fit in with their crowd, to feel good that other than buying good clothes and eating good food, they were undertaking a worthy venture, that they were looking out for themselves in their old age. The canes they dished out prove this! They wanted to mold me into what they wanted. ‘Gerrit’?

My wife will be selfish. I hope she is. Any selfless woman would denote a lack of complete DNA, something I don’t want passed on to my offspring. She will want a good life. A life with bills paid, a life with (a lot) of compliments and gifts, a secure and safe life, a warm bed, a life where she accomplishes her goals and serves her purpose a comfortable life. For fear of saying something I might pay for later, I’ve put down just but a few of the things the complicated fairer sex might want in their lives. No man has ever understood a woman, I won’t to attempt to be the first.

How then do I choose this woman over the rest? How do I pick out one (not that I have any to pick from, it sounded good to say it though!) and marry her selfish needs to my own?  WISDOM! No?

Where do you get wisdom? In my quest for wisdom, I’ve read books, many books, from Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves to some book I’d not want to remember, one that our chemistry teacher tried to teach us from; from erotica (hehehe this one always has made my heart beating a little faster and trousers a little tighter) to cook books. I have interacted with a lot of people; from Wangui, who led me through a roller-coaster of emotions in my pre-teen years to Soldier, who just won’t let me pass through the gate in peace. From prostitutes to priests……

I have come to the conclusion that Wisdom can only be gotten from God. That it is a gift He bestows on whom He wills. That any other purported source of wisdom is questionable. That I can try to imitate the things done by (purported) wise men in any given situation but will only come to the realization that, it might have worked out for them, given their circumstances which may have been way different from mine. That, it’s only in obeying God’s word and getting down on my knees, seeking His will. (For praying without first doing what God tells you to do, may be an exercise in futility and I don’t want to try finding that out).

In the beginning was the Word, the Word was with God and the Word was God. The Bible has been a good ‘guide’ in many aspects of my life. It would have been, for ALL aspects but then, and like I said earlier, I’ve made foolish decisions in life. It has something even for someone seeking a wife!

This is what I pray for, this is what I think this Adam is looking for in an Eve: I want a (short) woman, who is always on her knees, seeking God and the wisdom that comes from Him!

That will be a marriage of (selfish) wants and needs, in a wise way. A common purpose. For the rest of our lives.

By Guestwriter

PS: If there be any such woman out there, please get in touch prayingforawife@hotmail.com

Relationships are like….

From time to time, we tend to liken or equate relationships with things or experiences in life. Some are funny, some bitter, some sweet and some painful.

Relationships are like glass. Glass can be delicate and if not properly handled, it can easily break and shatter. Sometimes it’s better to leave the broken glass than try to pick up the pieces; someone might end up getting cut. However, sometimes tough experiences that we go through may shatter us like glass but we all know how tough that recycled glass is. Think Kitengela Glass; that stuff is colorful, not clear enough to look through, much like the scars that broken relationships may leave us with but more importantly, it looks like it can weather anything. They say what doesn’t kills us makes us stronger.

Relationships can be like mirrors. It is said that sometimes, who you choose to date is a reflection of how you feel about yourself. Now, whilst some of us may not buy into that type of analysis, it is true that sometimes we have to look at ourselves in the mirror when getting into or are already in a relationship. A while back, we wrote about the Eve/Adam in the Mirror with the basic message that whilst it is good to set up standards we want our (potential) partner to meet, we also have to be able to carry qualities that would be embraced in a relationship and to be able to recognize happiness and contentment in our lives.  I think sometimes we get into relationships that we think we deserve because of past experiences that we may have had, and mostly not good ones. If those relationships are not good for us, then we have to look in the mirror and go out there and get what is good for us. Honey, nobody will go out there and do it for you.

I don’t do drugs but it is said that relationships can be like drugs. They can give you the best feeling in the whole wide world or they can seriously mess you up (or kill you). That much is true.

Being in a relationship or looking for one can sometimes feel like on a sailing adventure. Aye aye Captain! A relationship can be like being on a ship and from having watched the Pirates of the Caribbean and the Titanic (yes, I have a lot of sailing experience), a compass or similar device is needed to give direction. So whilst at the beginning you may want to be all care free without necessarily moving towards any particular direction, at some point, nature just has a way of nudging you to get a sense of direction and to know where you are headed. No one wants to be lost at sea; otherwise, you better have a solid plan when the storm hits. And unlike sailing where you can be on auto-pilot, you cannot put a relationship on an auto mode, you need to check and recheck to see if you are still on the proper coordinates; otherwise, you may end up on auto-disaster.

Relationships can be very much like banking. You put some in, you take some out but someone, ideally both of you in the relationship should be looking at how it’s all balancing out.

I am no expert in making investments but I know enough to have got my fingers burnt but also made some good returns. When many of us make inputs into investments, we gamble and expect that we shall make good returns. We all know that sometimes, that whilst investments we make in partnerships with other people can be quite profitable, they can also let us down terribly since we have to rely on other people’s inputs and when they don’t step up to the game, then it can lead to a lot of disappointment. Relationships require inputs from the two parties (if you are having inputs from many other people, you need to ask yourselves some questions about who is actually in the relationship) and sometimes, one party may be putting in more than the other. This is not to say that both parties should invest equal amounts of time, energy, etc but one party should not be left feeling like they are being taken advantage of when they look at the ‘rate of return’ in the relationship. And while at it investing in your relationship, don’t forget to invest in yourself.

Someone told me that relationships can be like farts. Yes, farts. Here now and then gone leaving a bad you know what, yeah, pungent smell.

Relationships are like computers. Takes time to boot and then sometimes, you just have to keep restarting it because it is either too overloaded, or too slow to get all the commands you are giving it. Then the good part, or bad one depending on how you look at it, is if the computer just won’t give you what you need even after taking it to IT and all s/he tells you is to “restart it”, then you know it is probably time to upgrade.

Relationships (some relationships) are like a good meal, prepared meticulously and served with style and class. You take one course and can’t wait to see what the next course holds. Of course, the opposite is true, that sometimes, as soon as you get the appetizer, you do not want to know what the next serving will be! And if you serve through to dessert for failure of an exit strategy, you need detox many days after that or you may even to see a specialist L.

Relationships are like a job. Actually they are a job. What I mean in this case is that sometimes, you apply for a new job looking for better prospects and sure, you get a new posting and it can either feel like an anti-climax (because it has the same challenges or hiccups and same annoying workmates) or it takes you to the next level, giving you exactly what you are looking for even if you have to work hard to maintain it and show your worth.

What do you think relationships are like?

Have your say.

By Joyce